Top 90 Funny Halloween Jokes for for Kids & Adults to Elevate the Fun

Telling Halloween jokes that are funny is one of the best ways to make this day fulfilled. In this sharing, we present the collection prepared by Olivia Knightley - Personal Chic’s expert writer which includes the funniest jokes for Halloween made for both kids and adults using all themes from witch, dad, trick-or-treat, to knock-knock.

Top Funny Halloween Jokes for Kids

First and foremost, what to keep in mind when composing or picking a suitable joke for kids on Halloween is to keep the humour light, playful, and, most importantly, age-appropriate. For a safe approach, you can draw inspiration from classic children’s literature and popular kids’ shows to craft funny Halloween jokes for kids that are engaging enough for them. And, here are top carefully selected ones to consider:

• Why don’t mummies take vacations? Because they’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind!
• What’s a ghost’s favourite dessert? I-scream!
• What’s a witch’s favourite subject in school? Spelling!
• Why don’t vampires like parties? They’re afraid of the stake!
• What’s a ghost’s favourite game? Hide and shriek!
• Why did the spider go to the computer? To check his web site!
• What do ghosts use to wash their hair? Shamboo!

Top Halloween Childrens Jokes

• How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
• Why was the broom late? It swept in!
• Why don’t ghosts like the rain? It dampens their spirits!
• What did the little witch say to her cat? You’re purr-fectly spook-tacular!
• Why do witches wear name tags? So they know which witch is which!
• Why did the vampire read the newspaper? He heard it had great circulation!
• How do you make a skeleton laugh? Tickle its funny bone!
• Why was the ghost so bad at lying? Because you could see right through him!

Top Dirty Halloween Jokes for Adults

In contrast, for grown-up Halloween audiences, to elevate the fun, a cheeky and a bit mischievous tone is the secret ingredient to make your dirty Halloween rude jokes for adults shine. For example, inspired by recent viral adult comedies and seasoned with popular Halloween mischief memes on social media, here are some dirty Halloween jokes that are sure to bring a wicked smile:

• Why don’t ghosts need Viagra? Because they get plenty of boo-tiful spirits!
• What’s a witch’s favourite adult game? Hide the broomstick!
• Why was the skeleton so bad in bed? He didn’t have enough backbone!
• What do vampires and men have in common? They both like to go for the neck!
• How do ghosts like to cuddle? They get under the sheets!
• What’s a vampire’s favourite kind of beer? Bloodweiser!
• How do you make a monster blush? Take away its bedsheet!

Top Dirty Halloween Rude Jokes for Adults

• Why did the zombie go on a diet? He wanted to look drop-dead gorgeous!
• What do you call a ghost with a dirty mind? A boo-perv!
• Why did the werewolf go to therapy? He had too many inner beasts!
• What do you get when you cross a witch with a sex therapist? A wicked good time!
• Why was the pumpkin blushing? It saw the vine undressing!
• What do ghosts say to get attention? Boo-ty call!
• Why don’t skeletons make good lovers? They lack the heart to get things going!
• What’s a mummy’s idea of a good time? Getting unwrapped!

Top Witch Jokes for Halloween

Witch is, for sure, one of the most iconic staples when it comes to Halloween. Therefore, not just for happy Halloween quotes, we can consider witch themes for hilarious Halloween jokes to have a matching Halloween vibe. Drawing inspiration from folklore, classic Halloween tales, and, of course, famous witchy characters from movies, these are witch jokes for Halloween to try:

• Why was the witch’s broom late? It swept in!
• Why don’t witches fly in the rain? Because they’re afraid of getting witch-slapped by the wind!
• What did the witch say to the vampire? Bite me, if you dare!
• How do witches stay in shape? They do witch-craftics!
• What’s a witch’s favourite type of candle? Hex-scented!
• Why don’t witches use GPS? They follow their witch-tuition!
• What kind of music do witches listen to? Witch-hop!

Top Cool Halloween Jokes with Witch Theme

• How do witches stay safe when flying? They buckle their spell-t belts!
• Why did the witch switch to electric broomsticks? For a cleaner getaway!
• How do witches pay for their broomsticks? They use hex credit!
• Why was the witch’s cauldron so expensive? It had a lot of spell appeal!
• What do witches ask for at Halloween restaurants? Just a pinch of salt and a dash of eye of newt, please!
• Why do witches get good cell reception? They always have full broom bars!
• What do witches put on their bagels? Scream cheese!
• Why did the witch refuse dessert? She was already too spell-bound!

Best Trick or Treat Jokes for Halloween

Trick or treat - it’s the custom of Halloween. So, what better than incorporating it with your jokes to produce some clever ones. As you write down your hilarious Halloween jokes, thinking of the playful sweets exchanges among kids and adults or trending Halloween memes can bring you a fresh inspiration for an iconic phrase like these following:

• Why did the ghost go trick-or-treating? To lift his spirits!
• What do you call a vampire who loves candy? A sucker for sweets!
• Why was the skeleton so calm? Because nothing gets under his skin, not even trick-or-treaters!
• What did the zombie say after eating too much candy? I’m stuffed to the brain!
• Why do witches make great trick-or-treaters? They always spell out “treat” perfectly!
• What’s a trick-or-treater’s favourite type of pie? Pumpkin scream!
• Why don’t mummies go trick-or-treating? They’re afraid they’ll unwind!

Top Funniest Jokes for Halloween Trick-or-treat

• How do vampires keep their candy fresh? They put it in blood banks!
• Why did the werewolf avoid chocolate? He didn’t want to be a choco-howl-ic!
• What do skeletons say before trick-or-treating? Bone appétit!
• Why did the witch refuse to trick-or-treat in the rain? Her broomstick would frizz!
• How do you fix a broken jack-o’-lantern before trick-or-treating? With a pumpkin patch!
• Why did the candy go to school? It wanted to be a smartie!
• Why don’t zombies need trick-or-treat bags? They’re too busy snacking on brains!
• What’s a monster’s favourite trick-or-treat candy? Anything that goes crunch!

The Coolest Dad Jokes for Halloween

Dad jokes are well known for their endearing but a bit cheesy appeal. For Halloween, you can bring it an additional twist of spookiness. Let’s embrace the puns and the casualty from everyday lighthearted moments to create dad jokes for Halloween. And, here are top funny jokes on Halloween perfect for the dads who love to make everyone groan and giggle:

• Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
• What do you call a witch’s garage? A broom closet!
• What did the pumpkin say to the carver? Cut it out!
• How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
• Why did the mummy go to the doctor? He was feeling a little wrapped up!
• What’s a ghost’s favourite dessert? I-scream!
• How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!

The Best Halloween Dad Jokes

• Why don’t witches use the microwave? They prefer to use their cauldrons for potions!
• Why did the ghoul get in trouble? For having too many “boo”s!
• What do you call a cleaning skeleton? The “Grim Sweeper”!
• What did the ghost say to the bee? “Boo”bees!
• How does a witch greet her friends? “What’s up, my broomstick?”
• Why did Dracula become a vegetarian? Because biting necks was just too full of “stir”rings!
• What’s a ghost’s favourite type of music? Soul!
• Why did the mummy call his doctor? He had a bad case of “wrapping” problems!

Top Unique Halloween Knock Knock Jokes

Knock knock! - Who’s there? Well, we are, probably, too familiar with these knock knock jokes, but, for Halloween, let’s make them extra spooky with special Halloween themes. These hilarious Halloween jokes will be perfect to use when your kids knock doors and start their trick-or-treat fun. Here are top Halloween knock knock jokes curated by Personal Chic: 

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Witch.

Witch who?

Witch one of you is handing out the candy?

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Boo-berry.

Boo-berry who?

Boo-berry nice to meet you!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Frank.

Frank who?

Frank-enstein! I’m here for the treats!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Fangs.

Fangs who?

Fangs for the candy!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Boo.

Boo who?

Don’t cry—it’s just a joke!

Top Jokes for Halloween Knock Knock

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Ghost.

Ghost who?

Ghost you got any candy?

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Mummy.

Mummy who?

Mummy said I could have some candy!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Pumpkin.

Pumpkin who?

Pumpkin to answer the door?

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Dracula.

Dracula who?

Dracula all the candy before I get some!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Bats.

Bats who?

Bats all, folks!

Top Funniest Jokes for Halloween Knock Knock

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Candy.

Candy who?

Candy you spare a treat or two?

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Skeleton.

Skeleton who?

Skeletons don’t need candy—but I do!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Grim.

Grim who?

Grim and bear it—give me some candy!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Ghoul.

Ghoul who?

Ghoul-ash! I’m here for Halloween treats!

• Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Howl.

Howl who?

Howl about some candy for this howl-oween?

To sum up, Halloween jokes that are funny when crafted thoughtfully can add a delightful twist to the holiday’s spooky charm. With our suggestions from light-hearted quotes for kids to cheeky humour for adults, we hope to bring laughter and joy to any Halloween gathering.